You have got to be kidding me!!!!

So I am gradually getting more embarrassed as the night progresses. I mean there are things we regret that we did years ago but this was literally 3 days ago. So Nay and I were chilling and she had a tinder so we were swiping and it was kinda interesting but here is the thing when it is someone else’s identity out there the pressure is off of you. But stupid me decided to get one and I’ve seen people on there that used to be teachers at my high school and I’ve seen friends and acquaintances. I knew it was a mistake after I downloaded it and so I deleted it, well then I redownloaded it cause I’m an idiot. And who sees it? The guy at work, the only guy at work that I even liked like a little bit, but this guy I don’t like just a little bit so that is the first issue. Here is how it went down” so I clock in I’m at work. Looking at the summer schedule sign up and he comes in and stands at the same table I’m at, to my left and he says, “Can I ask you a weird question?” It took me a good few seconds to realize that he was asking me this question but I looked at him and nodded my head. I might’ve said something like “yeah” but I was honestly a little flabbergasted that he was talking to me, directly like not in a group of people. Next, he says “Do you happen to have a Tinder?” My eyes get real wide and I say “yeeeeaaaah” real slow and then he says ” Cause you showed up on mine but I wasn’t sure if it was you or not, so I swiped right.” Take a moment just let that sink in. I know what you are thinking, Girl you just went through this self-induced fantasy that will never happen with another boy and now you don’t even talk to him anymore. To that I would respond with yes, I did but this guy I don’t really know and we only come in contact with at work and it is not impossible for us to work together and not interact. To be honest that is what we are doing right now and have been since he started working there. So anyway I know that keeping this fantasy is bad but I need something to hope for until I get a new job or get transferred. Back to the story, So after he said he swiped right my mind was blown and I couldn’t really think straight. I made some excuse that I got it as a joke to see if my friend would show up and he didn’t buy it, and then idiot me spoke again and said something about I will swipe right yada yada yada yada. So at this current moment, I am reliving everything that went down and trying to think through what he meant by all of that. I need to talk to someone but Alyssa would just disapprove, Joy would probably laugh at me and Nay won’t give the best advice probably and even if she could I won’t see her until tomorrow. I’m trying to stay calm and my heart rate is at 58 bpm calm so I guess I am calm but I really don’t feel like I am. Half of me wants to open my tinder right now and start swiping till I get to him but another part of me wants to delete it and never look back. I’m more embarrassed of my tinder profile bio and such. It’s so cheesy and stupid.

On the bright side, I got the opportunity to work at Five Points today. The store is a decent size but the prep area is so small and cramped. I hate it. The set up is arranged poorly and there was a group of trainees packed in there. The people, on the other hand, know what they’re doing. One of the managers, the one I worked with tonight, Bill, I worked with him when I started at the JJs on Prospect. We opened on Sundays. I don’t know if he still remembered me. He didn’t recognize me so I doubt it. The workers are kids still but Bill is pretty strict so it was a lot different. I kind of wanted to stay for a whole shift but at least I got to experience that hour and a half. They were pretty busy too.

what are the odds that I get on his screen and he swipes right and tells me? If he told me that means it’s okay if I swipe right on him then and who has to say something first cause I would say the most idiotic thing possible. oh boy such a pickle I am in.

 

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